Steadfast

There is a "devotional" app that I downloaded for my Windows Phone, but I know it's available on iPhone and Android as well.  My facebook friends are probably sick of hearing about it, but it's been so revolutionary for me.  It's called Another Day of Victory.  It sounds so cheesy, but really it's so good.  I get something from it nearly everyday that I read it.

One particular devotional that I read recently hit me in such a personal way.  It was about faithfulness, and I wanted to share with you a peek into my life the past 4 years spiritually.

In April of 2008 I was going to church regularly, I would sing on the worship team and in the choir.  I was on the whole, faithful to God.  I was wavering though.  I was letting little things pull me down and because I wasn't strong in my prayer life they were allowed to grow into BIG things that eventually caused me to lose faith and completely withdraw. I let myself get hurt by what should have been some Godly wisdom meant to strengthen me, but instead I took it as an offense and I let that be my justification for leaving church and letting my relationship with God slowly deteriorate. By 2010 I was completely out of church and I was letting things into my life that had no business being there.

Fast forward to July 2012 and God was barely a blip on my radar.  He had VERY little to do with my life.  There were times that I wanted him to, I knew that I needed to get back into church, but I had gotten so far away from what I knew to be right.  I had so many problems and for some irrational reason I wanted to hold tight to the one or two parts of my life that I felt made me happy.

Finally God got my attention in a big way!  Helped me to see a lot of the ways I was being ridiculous and selfish.  My life had to almost fall apart before I would realize that the 90% of my life that wasn't good was that way because of the 10% that I considered a fun and happy part of my life was actually contributing to the unhappiness of the other 90%... I see that now.  We don't realize that some of the seemingly innocent things we let in our life can lead to compromise on a much grander scale.

This brings me to faithfulness.  I consider myself a very loyal person.  It is built into who I am naturally.  I have an easy time being faithful to family and friends, so why did I have such a hard time being faithful to God?  Is it because I can't see him?  Is it because I let doubt slip in?  Probably, but if I truly love God the way that I say I do, then I should show God the same Faithfulness that I show to the people that are in my life.

Faithfulness is being steadfast.  Even when things aren't going so great.  Even when I feel that God isn't listening or doing things quick enough for my liking.  Faithlessness is a very selfish act.  Ironically it is an act of faithfulness but it's faithfulness to one's ego.  I detest selfishness and egotistical people... yet, I was being that person to God.  I want to be STEADFAST in my love and relationship with God.  I want to be FAITHFUL!

Maybe some of you can relate, maybe some of you can't.  If you can't relate in a spriritual way, then maybe you can see how this realization that I had can translate into the relationships you have with the people who are close to you.

Have a great Wednesday everyone!